9. J.J. Barea: "The congratulatory sext from Anthony Weiner." 8. Rodrigue Beaubois: "Helped take the sting out of hearing Hef’s wedding was cancelled." 7. Brian Cardinal: "It’s every kid’s dream to lick the Larry O’Brien Trophy." 6. Coach Carlisle: "U.S. Constitution permits NBA champs to sit in on national security briefings." 5. Tyson Chandler: "Celebrating with my kitties." 4. Caron Butler: "Why didn’t anyone tell me we won?" 1. Dirk Nowitzki: "It might land me a Kardashian sister."