This Just In: Dirk Nowitzki is Still Awesome, Hilarious

I don't know why, but seeing that a guy has to hold up a "DIRK NOWITZKI" sign the entire time he talks so everyone knows who he is just cracks me up. Mandatory Credit: Bob Donnan-US PRESSWIRE

This is probably the 1,235,895th time I've said it, but I love Dirk Nowitzki.

Dirk also gives some great answers to questions posed to him at the NBA All-Star Media Day.

The most wonderful Zach Lowe has highlights of the media day over the weekend over at The Point Forward. Check out the full story for some pretty interesting quotes and even more hilarity. But for your reading pleasure, I've pulled all the Dirk bits for you, because I love you. So let's dive right in:

Two of the first three questions Love received were about Lin. This was typical. One reporter asked Dirk Nowitzki to compare Lin, a point guard and Taiwanese-American, with Yi Jianlian, a Chinese national who is almost 7 feet tall. "That’s like apples and pears," Nowitzki said.

Apples and pears: obviously the most well-known yin-yang in the entire universe. More Dirk-ness after the jump:

Lots of folks around the league and here in Orlando have noted how often Mavs’ owner Mark Cuban has talked up Shawn Marion recently, suggesting Cuban is trying to pump up Marion’s trade value. If the Mavs want to offer near-max contracts to both Deron Williams and Howard, they will have to somehow clear Marion’s $8.4 million salary for 2012-13. Nowitzki disagreed with the idea that Cuban is hyping Marion for this purpose. "I don’t think that is what he’s doing," Nowitzki said. "Shawn is often overlooked by the media, and he’s such a big part of what we do. I think it’s more Cubes just being happy for Shawn."

This is one of those questions reporters just have to ask, because this is a real story (Mavs pursuing Williams and Howard and needing more cap room), but they already know what answer they're going to get. It's part of the business. Do you really think Dirk was going to answer, "Well duh Cubes is, we've gotta ship that guy outta here so I can get my own big three. Whatever works, man." No. Of course he isn't. But it's still a question that should be asked.

A Chinese media outlet asked Nowitzki if he would look into the camera and say, "I’m blah, blah, and you’re watching me on [name of network]." The reporter obviously used "blah, blah" as shorthand for Nowitzki’s name. So of course, Nowitzki ruined the first promo by jokingly referring to himself as "blah, blah" before doing the real thing — all with a smile on his face.

Richard Pryor. George Carlin. Chris Rock. Jerry Seinfeld. Larry David. Louis C.K. Dirk Nowitzki. That's the list. *drops mic, leaves.*

Paul Pierce said Nowitzki is the toughest one-on-one matchup in the league.

No sh*t.

Kidding aside, there's some crazy synergy, karma, full-circle thing working with this little nugget. As most know, the Mavericks were picking between Pierce and Nowitzki in the 1998 draft, essentially knowing Pierce was a more sure-fire prospect out of Kansas while Nowitzki could end up being something greater – or completely explode in their face.

Again, thanks to Lowe for pulling these. We could all use more Dirk in our lives, I think that's unquestioned. Also, check out Lowe's site if you want to become a more knowledgeable NBA fan. DO IT.

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