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How the Mavericks can lure Giannis Antetokounmpo away from the Bucks

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A Dallas delicacy might be the key to convincing the Greek Freak to join the Mavs.

Milwaukee Bucks v Boston Celtics - Game Two Photo by Maddie Meyer/Getty Images

For years, the Dallas Mavericks — and their mouthpieces in the media — have extolled the virtues of Dallas and Texas in their attempts to lure free agents into signing with the team. The cost of living in Dallas is low compared to coastal cities and Texas doesn’t have a state income tax, meaning you take home more of your paycheck at the end of the day. While sensible talking points, they usually fall on deaf ears. What twenty-something cares about cost of living when he’s taking home multiple millions annually? It’s time for the Mavs to change their strategy. It’s time for them to woo free agents with food.

To be sure, any negotiation with free agents already involves food. A nice steak dinner at Nick and Sam’s in Dallas is par for the course when an inquisitive marquee player comes to town. Frankly though, star athletes can eat a similar meal in any city any night of the week. Give up on the passé dinners, Mavs. Go for something regional. Go for something unique. Go for something beloved. Go for corn dogs.

Yes, you read that right: Corn dogs. It’s not as crazy as an idea as it might seem. They’re delicious after all. Also, as we recently discovered, Giannis Antetokounmpo is a newly minted corn dog fan.

You know Antetokounmpo, don’t you? He’s the “Greek Freak.” He’s the guy the Mavs were going to draft in 2013 but didn’t. Well Mavericks, it looks like it’s time right that wrong by stepping up your recruiting game (via proxy agents, of course, lest the league come down on you) and coax him to Dallas with the best corn dogs in the world: Fletcher’s Corny Dogs.

We’re not talking about the trash run of the mill, frozen corn dogs you can buy at Costco. Fletcher’s Corny Dogs are transcendent. Based on Antetokounmpo’s picture, he’s enjoying some bottom of the barrel, arena concession stand corn dogs. They look pathetic and he still likes them. Pounce while the iron is hot, Mavs!

It doesn’t matter that he’s signed with the Milwaukee Bucks through the 2020-21 season. One taste of a Fletcher’s Corny Dog and it’s almost guaranteed that he’ll be begging for a trade to Dallas. Look, we all know that you can only get Fletcher’s during the State Fair of Texas and sometimes at special events but exceptions can definitely be made to get Giannis a regular supply of the golden brown delicacies in order to bring him to town. Maybe The Lakewood Landing can pitch in a few of their late night corn dogs during Fletcher’s off-season to keep Antetokounmpo satisfied year-round. Needless to say, something can be worked out.

Look Mavs, everyone knows your track record of landing star players. It’s not good. Talk of tax savings and those animated comic book videos just aren’t cutting it. Plan Powder? LOL. It’s time for a new approach. It’s time for corn dogs.