By now you’ve no doubt seen the clip of Mavs owner Mark Cuban’s appearance on ESPN’s First Take last week, when he tried to squeeze himself and his team into the white hot conversation surrounding the budding romance between Taylor Swift and Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce. Well, here we are to squeeze the last drops of any remaining juice from this story.
“Taylor, sorry if you’re listening, Travis,” Cuban said in an interview with hosts Stephen A. Smith and Molly Qerim Rose. “Break up with him. I’ve got a bunch of good-looking, single guys that play for the Dallas Mavericks. I got you.”
Marketing has always been one of Cuban’s strengths, of course. A couple hours after the show’s account on X, formerly Twitter, posted the clip, Kelce responded with a unique idea — one that a certain editor of a certain Mavs blog thinks holds more than a little merit.
.@mcuban wants Taylor Swift to break up with Travis Kelce to date a Mavs player— First Take (@FirstTake) September 28, 2023
"Taylor, sorry if you're listening Travis. Break up with him, I got a bunch of good-looking single guys that play for the Dallas Mavericks. I gotchu." pic.twitter.com/wkA2fgHmkJ
“@MCuban Just sign me to a ten day! ” Kelce replied. To which Kirk Henderson of Mavs Moneyball replied, “Yes please.”
The show’s post had more than 1,000 reposts and 10,000 likes, Kelce’s reply had nearly 6,000 reposts and 45,000 likes and Henderson’s reply to the reply had, well, one repost and 13 likes as of Monday night.
Yes please— Kirk Henderson (@KirkSeriousFace) September 28, 2023
Now that we’ve had time to complete our admittedly cursory bit of research into the personal lives of some of the most eligible Mavericks bachelors on the current roster, we’re ready to give you, fair reader, the definitive list of who, if anyone, should shoot his shot with T-Swift like Kelce did.
Our qualifications to make this list include but are not limited to: currently being single (as far as we can tell), being age appropriate to potentially date the 33-year-old mega-platinum superstar and subjectively meeting Cuban’s own criteria of being “good-looking.” They are presented here in no particular order.
The 10-year age difference between the Australian-born up-and-comer and Tay Tay is about as much as we’re willing to allow for here, but we’re generally willing to listen to the “age is just a number, man” counterargument, too. Green has a a slighter frame than Kelce, but fills out 6’7” and 200 pounds nicely. Kelce goes 6’5” and 250 pounds.
His game on the floor points to Green as a smooth operator. He’s confident with his silky smooth jump shot, but he’s not lacking in the emotional intelligence it takes to be both a good teammate and a good partner. He’s a hard worker with a winning attitude.
And if Green breaks out this season like many think he can, Swift would be getting in on the ground floor of something very new and exciting in a date or two with the Dallas guard.
Tim Hardaway Jr.
Sure. It would blow our minds, too. But let’s not so quickly forget all the things that Tim Hardaway Jr. has going for him, both on and off the court. He is, after all, the first Maverick to record 200-plus 3-pointers in multiple seasons.
Just look at that smile. The well-coiffed beard points to a guy who’s got it all together. The 6’5”, 205-pound shooting guard is going into his age-31 season, so he’s right in Swift’s age-range wheelhouse.
Hardaway Jr. has long teetered on the edge of stardom in the NBA, averaging 17.5, then 18.1 points per game in the 2017-18 and 2018-19 seasons before settling into the 15 points per game range in his time with the Mavericks. Pairing with T. Swizzle would immediately change all that, of course. He scored at a 14.4 clip in 2022-23, for the record.
Kleber is the wild card on our list, and not just because the 6’10” center has a little less name recognition than the previous two options. He’s also going into his age-31 season, and could benefit from a simplified role this season to become a true three-and-D big man.
At 6’10” and 240 pounds, a potential relationship with Miss Americana would make literally the biggest splash of the bunch. Her current relationship with Kelce suggests she digs a bigger dude, though.
Kleber is no stranger to nailing big shots (on the court, of course, keep your minds out of the gutter), either. Can you imagine trips to the German countryside on Kleber’s arm? The thought of it is positively dreamy.